I figure, since this is a relatively new blog, I'd better give you an idea of what the heck "Life by Seven" means. To the laymen (which is pretty much everyone that isn't me), Life by Seven is embracing your "virtue".
Yeah, I know, it sounds random and weird, especially since virtue is typically categorized as a religious concept only ever achieved by heavenly sages and incorrupt saints. Nonetheless, virtue is the foundation of the Life by Seven curriculum (that be a fancy word for livin').
I exist by virtute.
This means I strive to live for myself, because I know that doing so promotes a clean existence, one devoid of social static and what Marie Forleo has coined "Compareschlager". When we focus on ourselves and work to nurture that unique perspective, we experience something amazing: extreme pleasure.
This sits in direct contrast to allowing the rest of the world to dominate how we look at things, and more importantly, how we feel about them. Omitting the social static and tossing out that bottle of Compareschlager helps us to re-connect with who we are at our core. It is, after all, where we begin. Starting off with a clean, broom-swept foundation is the key to healthy creation.
That's how this chiz works: what we are is what we put out there. If we don't have the first clue about our identity, we don't have any real control over our actions. We float around like a dry leaf in autumn, with no care or direction. We just...let the wind take us.
I actually lived that way for about five years. From age seventeen to twenty-two I bobbed through life without any course or direction. I remember thinking, after I had lost another job, as well as an entire group of friends (a blessing in disguise, ya'll), that I might not be on the right path in life. But did I bother jumping off of it? Nope. I kept right on going, skipping along and ignoring the giant rut I had worn into the ground beneath me.
Cut to a year later, as I sat on the side of the road, head in hands, car mangled to mush beneath an old tree (seriously, it looked like my Sunfire had been attacked by a Tree Herder from Fangorn Forest). Cops were scurrying around with flares, directing traffic away from me and my damaged ego.
The accident was insane but also more than a little poetic because it reflected everything that was going on inside me at the time. I wasn't just mildly nuts, I was completely out of control, and the worst part is: I knew it.
I knew I shouldn't be hanging out with certain people.
I knew I should take responsibility for myself.
I knew I should care more about my life.
But I couldn't seem to shake that need for acceptance. I had fallen into a cycle and it became like a drug. I needed to be loved and desired, and it didn't matter who was giving me that approval. I took whatever validation I could get because, somewhere along the line, I had forgotten how to do it myself.
Here's the Catch-22: happiness comes from within, not without. So if we look to other people to solidify who we are, we lose our identity. Other people do not make decisions for us. They are not our masters. Yet we become slaves to their approval, behaving in ways that we hope will give us the acceptance we can't seem to give ourselves. And even when we get it, the need for that approval continues, and sometimes it even grows because we are unable to duplicate it for ourselves. Truly, when it comes to happiness the only recognition that matters is our own. Happiness is a matter of perspective, so what makes one person happy may not do the same for another. It is something that is wholly owned and emerges from "within".
Rewind to el accidento, which occurred at a time when I had begun to make these little connections. I did so by observing the people around me. I realized that none of them were happy either, so all we had been doing was trading the same battered approval back and forth, like a ratty old library book (you know, the kind with tattered pages and a cover so worn you can't make out the title?). I realized that none of us had a title. It had rubbed off years before and we had no idea who we were or what the hell we were doing.
That's when I made a decision: the tower had to come down. I was done living in a 6x6 turret. I had to break out, and I did so by way of a car wreck so symbolic that, to this day, I still lean back in wide-eyed surprise whenever I think about it. The damn thing literally exemplified a question I had unconsciously posed to myself:
Do I want to live or do I want to die?
Don't fret, when I say "die" I don't mean it in the sense you probably think. Here, death is more an allegory. It represents what happens when we fail to initiate, manage, and experience our lives.
During my accident, I spun out of control, which was exactly what I was doing in life: spiraling. I wasn't moving forward or backward rather I was stuck in mental, physical, and emotional Purgatory. I can remember, at some point during the spin, I hit a curb and launched onto the grassy median. I looked up and saw a MASSIVE Cypress tree straight ahead of me. Then I heard what I have come to refer to as "The Voice". No, not the TV show. This was a different kind of voice all together. It was loud and distinctly male and I was apparently the only person who heard it (when I asked the people who were with me later they looked at me like I had sprouted horns). It said, "Turn the wheel."
And I did.
Without thinking, I turned the wheel and instead of hitting the "Like a Boss" Cypress, I hit the dead Weeping Willow beside it. The thing split in half, its canopy fell on top of my roof, broke my back windshield, and swallowed the car whole (now you LOtR fans understand my Fangorn Forest reference). Oddly, sometime during the accident, the guy in the backseat had "decided" to lay down on the floor. The tree completely missed him. He had a couple of scratches from flying glass, but other than that, he was good.
Weirdest and most symbolic accident ever.
Cypress trees are symbols of death and the afterlife. Did I mention I missed that one. Ironically, I hit the truly dead tree beside it, which, to me, demonstrated my choice to clean out all the dormant energy clogging up my life. I had a lot to let go of and destroying that tree, and my car in the process, was like wiping the slate clean, because after that night, my life completely changed. I guess it can be of no consequence that the lesson of the Willow tree is to keep growing and reaching higher, no matter where you are planted.
Change can occur when, instead of continuing to spiral, we surrender to the truth that forces its way into our lives. We listen to signs, much like I listened to that voice, and we make choices based on our gut feelings. Where do these signs come from? Why, within, of course. We are interpreting them as signs, so they belong to us, and they help us grow and change. That night, I chose to start living. I no longer wanted to simply exist. I wanted to grab life with both hands and make something wonderful.
Seven months later, I was promoted and I met the man I would eventually marry.
Circumstance mirrors how you feel inside, and that's the first clue to this crazy crap called life. Your thoughts and feelings are the tools you use to make it, so if they're dark, you're life's gonna be dark. This isn't a bad thing. It's actually the coolest thing in the world because it proves that, not only do we hold all the cards, we can also select how we deal them out.
Living by virtute means surrendering to who we are at our core. It's a common misconception that living for "me" is a selfish thing to do, when really it's the purest way to go about life. I mean, if you aren't here to live for you, then why the hell are you you? People often encourage others to be true to themselves in one breath, then condemn them for following through with it in the next. It's easy to talk about being authentic, but it can be shocking for others when someone actually does it, because it points out what they have failed to do for themselves.
I've said it before and I'll say it again, when a person is really true to who they are, they are never selfish, nor do they transcend their identity. Living our truth is about personal enrichment. Those who long for nothing, seek not the satisfaction of others, for they are already rich. Not with money or power, but with purpose. This is what living virtuously is all about: crafting a life on your terms and sharing that life with the world at large.
I bet right about now you're saying: "Okay, it's easy to talk about all of this, but how does one actually live by virtute?"
First, let us examine the meaning of virtue. By definition, virtue is moral excellence. It comes from the ancient Greek word arete, which means excellence of any kind. To the ancient Greeks this word embodied the concept of fulfillment - that is, the act of living up to one's full potential. The great Greek orator, Homer, often applied the term Arete to those who were highly effective, using all of their faculties to achieve real results. This viewpoint is interesting as it corresponds with my own idea of what virtue is about: personal enrichment. When we live up to our highest potential, we experience pleasure because we live out our truth. There is no bar set outside ourselves, no rule of life dictating how or who we should be. Virtuous living is pure living, and pure living means being authentic, being real.
In the realm of Christian thought there are seven virtues and they look a little something like this:
If you think about it, each of the foregoing "virtues" demonstrates a facet of humanty.
 |
| Photo by Tom Simpson |
Yeah, I know, it sounds random and weird, especially since virtue is typically categorized as a religious concept only ever achieved by heavenly sages and incorrupt saints. Nonetheless, virtue is the foundation of the Life by Seven curriculum (that be a fancy word for livin').
I exist by virtute.
This means I strive to live for myself, because I know that doing so promotes a clean existence, one devoid of social static and what Marie Forleo has coined "Compareschlager". When we focus on ourselves and work to nurture that unique perspective, we experience something amazing: extreme pleasure.
Did you get that?
Here, let me say it again:
IF YOU CHOOSE TO NURTURE YOUR OWN UNIQUE POINT OF VIEW AND ALLOW IT TO DRIVE YOUR EXISTENCE, YOU WILL EXPERIENCE
EXTREME PLEASURE.
EXTREME PLEASURE.
That's how this chiz works: what we are is what we put out there. If we don't have the first clue about our identity, we don't have any real control over our actions. We float around like a dry leaf in autumn, with no care or direction. We just...let the wind take us.
I actually lived that way for about five years. From age seventeen to twenty-two I bobbed through life without any course or direction. I remember thinking, after I had lost another job, as well as an entire group of friends (a blessing in disguise, ya'll), that I might not be on the right path in life. But did I bother jumping off of it? Nope. I kept right on going, skipping along and ignoring the giant rut I had worn into the ground beneath me.
Cut to a year later, as I sat on the side of the road, head in hands, car mangled to mush beneath an old tree (seriously, it looked like my Sunfire had been attacked by a Tree Herder from Fangorn Forest). Cops were scurrying around with flares, directing traffic away from me and my damaged ego.
The accident was insane but also more than a little poetic because it reflected everything that was going on inside me at the time. I wasn't just mildly nuts, I was completely out of control, and the worst part is: I knew it.
I knew I shouldn't be hanging out with certain people.
I knew I should take responsibility for myself.
I knew I should care more about my life.
But I couldn't seem to shake that need for acceptance. I had fallen into a cycle and it became like a drug. I needed to be loved and desired, and it didn't matter who was giving me that approval. I took whatever validation I could get because, somewhere along the line, I had forgotten how to do it myself.
Here's the Catch-22: happiness comes from within, not without. So if we look to other people to solidify who we are, we lose our identity. Other people do not make decisions for us. They are not our masters. Yet we become slaves to their approval, behaving in ways that we hope will give us the acceptance we can't seem to give ourselves. And even when we get it, the need for that approval continues, and sometimes it even grows because we are unable to duplicate it for ourselves. Truly, when it comes to happiness the only recognition that matters is our own. Happiness is a matter of perspective, so what makes one person happy may not do the same for another. It is something that is wholly owned and emerges from "within".
Rewind to el accidento, which occurred at a time when I had begun to make these little connections. I did so by observing the people around me. I realized that none of them were happy either, so all we had been doing was trading the same battered approval back and forth, like a ratty old library book (you know, the kind with tattered pages and a cover so worn you can't make out the title?). I realized that none of us had a title. It had rubbed off years before and we had no idea who we were or what the hell we were doing.
That's when I made a decision: the tower had to come down. I was done living in a 6x6 turret. I had to break out, and I did so by way of a car wreck so symbolic that, to this day, I still lean back in wide-eyed surprise whenever I think about it. The damn thing literally exemplified a question I had unconsciously posed to myself:
Do I want to live or do I want to die?
Don't fret, when I say "die" I don't mean it in the sense you probably think. Here, death is more an allegory. It represents what happens when we fail to initiate, manage, and experience our lives.
During my accident, I spun out of control, which was exactly what I was doing in life: spiraling. I wasn't moving forward or backward rather I was stuck in mental, physical, and emotional Purgatory. I can remember, at some point during the spin, I hit a curb and launched onto the grassy median. I looked up and saw a MASSIVE Cypress tree straight ahead of me. Then I heard what I have come to refer to as "The Voice". No, not the TV show. This was a different kind of voice all together. It was loud and distinctly male and I was apparently the only person who heard it (when I asked the people who were with me later they looked at me like I had sprouted horns). It said, "Turn the wheel."
And I did.
Without thinking, I turned the wheel and instead of hitting the "Like a Boss" Cypress, I hit the dead Weeping Willow beside it. The thing split in half, its canopy fell on top of my roof, broke my back windshield, and swallowed the car whole (now you LOtR fans understand my Fangorn Forest reference). Oddly, sometime during the accident, the guy in the backseat had "decided" to lay down on the floor. The tree completely missed him. He had a couple of scratches from flying glass, but other than that, he was good.
Weirdest and most symbolic accident ever.
Cypress trees are symbols of death and the afterlife. Did I mention I missed that one. Ironically, I hit the truly dead tree beside it, which, to me, demonstrated my choice to clean out all the dormant energy clogging up my life. I had a lot to let go of and destroying that tree, and my car in the process, was like wiping the slate clean, because after that night, my life completely changed. I guess it can be of no consequence that the lesson of the Willow tree is to keep growing and reaching higher, no matter where you are planted.
Change can occur when, instead of continuing to spiral, we surrender to the truth that forces its way into our lives. We listen to signs, much like I listened to that voice, and we make choices based on our gut feelings. Where do these signs come from? Why, within, of course. We are interpreting them as signs, so they belong to us, and they help us grow and change. That night, I chose to start living. I no longer wanted to simply exist. I wanted to grab life with both hands and make something wonderful.
Seven months later, I was promoted and I met the man I would eventually marry.
 |
| Photo by Stefano Corso |
Self Reflection
Living by virtute means surrendering to who we are at our core. It's a common misconception that living for "me" is a selfish thing to do, when really it's the purest way to go about life. I mean, if you aren't here to live for you, then why the hell are you you? People often encourage others to be true to themselves in one breath, then condemn them for following through with it in the next. It's easy to talk about being authentic, but it can be shocking for others when someone actually does it, because it points out what they have failed to do for themselves.
I've said it before and I'll say it again, when a person is really true to who they are, they are never selfish, nor do they transcend their identity. Living our truth is about personal enrichment. Those who long for nothing, seek not the satisfaction of others, for they are already rich. Not with money or power, but with purpose. This is what living virtuously is all about: crafting a life on your terms and sharing that life with the world at large.
I bet right about now you're saying: "Okay, it's easy to talk about all of this, but how does one actually live by virtute?"
First, let us examine the meaning of virtue. By definition, virtue is moral excellence. It comes from the ancient Greek word arete, which means excellence of any kind. To the ancient Greeks this word embodied the concept of fulfillment - that is, the act of living up to one's full potential. The great Greek orator, Homer, often applied the term Arete to those who were highly effective, using all of their faculties to achieve real results. This viewpoint is interesting as it corresponds with my own idea of what virtue is about: personal enrichment. When we live up to our highest potential, we experience pleasure because we live out our truth. There is no bar set outside ourselves, no rule of life dictating how or who we should be. Virtuous living is pure living, and pure living means being authentic, being real.
In the realm of Christian thought there are seven virtues and they look a little something like this:
 |
| Photo by Jenn and Tony Bot |
Oops! Wrong file. But isn't that robot Dopey at the back like, completely adorable?
Anyhoo, what I meant to say was, this:
Faith
Hope
Fortitude
Love
Temperance
JUSTICE
Prudence
We all have faith.
Belief is what grounds us in this reality - belief in ourselves, in a Higher Power, or in a particular cause.
We all hope.
We dream about the things we can accomplish, and hope to see them manifest.
We all have fortitude.
We act on our truth, as we can see its value and how it can affect humanity.
We all love.
We know that our truth is a gift, not just for ourselves, but for others as well.
We all practice temperance.
We speak about our truth and listen to those who respond to it.
We all practice justice.
We see our truth and understand how it affects us and the rest of the world.
We are all prudent.
We fully embody our truth and experience wisdom as a result.
It appears the concept of virtue is not a bar we must strive to reach rather a distinct part of the human condition. We all embody virtue, whether we realize it or not. So take this as encouragement to nurture your unique identity and to live a life of purity. Be true to you. Listen to the truth that emanates from within. It is never wrong.
Okay folks, that's it for today. Before I sign off I want to remind you that all parts of life are educational, even those we deem forgettable. They are especially significant because they help refine our character. In fact, whenever I think about the tough stuff, I get a clear image of a sculptor shaving grooves into his latest work. It may seem that the more difficult parts of our lives are violent, that they peel away sections of our foundation, leaving us exposed and vulnerable, but in actuality those events better define who we are and help us to create the best life possible.
*****
Okay folks, that's it for today. Before I sign off I want to remind you that all parts of life are educational, even those we deem forgettable. They are especially significant because they help refine our character. In fact, whenever I think about the tough stuff, I get a clear image of a sculptor shaving grooves into his latest work. It may seem that the more difficult parts of our lives are violent, that they peel away sections of our foundation, leaving us exposed and vulnerable, but in actuality those events better define who we are and help us to create the best life possible.
Thanks for reading!
Kisses, Hugs, and Super Loud Zorbits!
Be Fierce. Be Free. Be You.
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